ITS ALL ABOUT THE PRESENTATION NOT THE SIZE , MR STONE

                HELLO BOYS AND BYE BYE BOTTLE

IT seems apt that during Women's History Month something should occur in Medway and highlight why the female of the species are a force to be reckoned with.
You may recall my disdain in a previous post about an event at Rochester's Casino Rooms - the notorious ' National Cleavage Weekender ' and how I was convinced I'd been transported through a worm hole in the time/ space continuum to a parallel universe where Women's Lib had never happened.

Well dear reader it seems I wasn't the only one who thought that the whole thing  was a bit out-dated and more than just a "cheeky bit of fun " because on 22nd March 2013 the outcry over cleavage weekender did just what just what it says on the poster and went " national "

With a little bit of help from the writer of the original Medwire article( Michelle Gleaves ) , a Labour M.P ( Vince Maple ) and a certain adult education student ( guess who ? ) the Medway Messenger went live with their own piece on the event and it exploded through the social media and news stratosphere.  You can read their article here  http://t.co/iXY7Dbbcba

Picked up by amongst others the Mail, the Sun, ITV , the Huffington Post and making the BBC South East 10pm broadcast it swept across the country. It was even tweeted about by M.P Dianne Abbott in relation to the hash tag #Everyday Sexism .

Reaction fell into either one of two camps , those who thought it was just a light hearted bit of fun and that we were all getting our knickers ( and bra's ) in a twist about nothing or those who thought it was something worth shouting about .
 With condemnation for the night starting to build on Friday a message appeared on the Casino Rooms Facebook page that evening stating that  " as before we will be donating £1 towards the Breast Cancer U.K charity for every free entry ".  An odd turn of phrase that considering there is no mention of it on the poster which you would imagine would have made it an all the more popular night knowing it was going to a good cause ,do you not think ?

Also in a bid to make it sound a bit less sexist they joked of course  it was also open to men flashing their moobs or pecs , really cos you've missed putting some male cleavage on your poster , guys and again there's absolutely no mention of it ! Funny that ! It all reeks a little of trying to paper over some serious cracks at the last minute. 

Talking of the poster by the way ,there is a little something on the first one that has suspiciously gone A.W.O.L on the new one.
                                                      Can you spot the difference ?

Yes that's right, that Smirnoff ice bottle and logo that is so prevalent in the original poster has disappeared and why I hear you ask ? Well that's down to our good friend Cllr Maple who wrote to the firm Diageo who owns the brand and asked them if they were aware that their product was being used to promote such a night.

The reply from their head of government affairs Rachael Robertson was that of the negative and was quoted to have said  "I can confirm that Diageo in no way gave permission for our branding to be included and never would for such an irresponsible promotion. This would breach our rigorous internal codes on marketing and had approval been sought it would have been denied." she further added "We take our responsibility in marketing very seriously and would never want to be associated in any way with a promotion as irresponsible as this."

So it was bye bye bottle to National Cleavage Weekender.

 

Not that I imagine the Casino are too bothered there must be plenty of other drinks firms all too willing to get their drinks promoted in the future and as a good few people have pointed out alcohol does a lot more harm than a pair of boobs ever could.

 

So, from one little online news article a behemoth did grow showing that while lad culture might be on the rise some ladies aren't about to start letting them get away with it.

 

 And just for the record,while some of us girls have an opinion on what's right or what's not doesn't mean we're no fun.

To answer a few of my critics this week I'm not the worm that turned and I'm certainly no Mary Whitehouse but think about how your presenting this to the youngsters of today.

 A certain person commented on the Casino page that people like Michelle Gleaves and myself should ' unstitch our vaginas ' and realise that theme nights like this aren't ever that popular, that they are just to get people through the door and if we worked in a night club background we'd know that .

 

 This may be true but having worked in a night club myself I know that all to often these days girls ( and lets face it despite what the clubs might say about their over 18 policy that's just what some of these females are ) take 'theme ' and fancy dress to mean go out in a bra , thong and tutu as the ' sexy ' version of whatever the night is all about. Programmes like BBC 3's snog, marry, avoid all to often feature girls who think its the norm to have to dress this way to get people to love them and still don't believe that perhaps if they were just themselves and not a scary porn style caricature the one person who needs to love them ( I.E themselves )might be much happier.

To finish ,Breast Cancer is a serious disease and needs to be taught some respect , if the poster had featured a few less ' glamour model ' fake boobs and carried the charity logo there might never have been all this kerfuffle in the first place.

 

In fact Mr Stone , if you had thought  a little more about your presentation and less about the size ( of the crowd ) maybe it wouldn't have caused such a controversy about town .

 

( But I'm pretty sure you're glad it did )

 

 

 

 

 

TO TIMIDITY AND BEYOND .......

IMAGINE being so scared of having to speak to anyone that you'd rather wet your pants than have to open your mouth and ask to go to the toilet .
It probably sounds a bit silly to some people but that was me aged 5 so crippled by shyness that I would rather stand in a puddle of my own pee than tell the teacher I really needed to visit the lavatory.
I don't know what caused me to become so introverted and timid upon joining the education system but whatever it was brought me to the decision at that tender age not speak to anyone else apart from my family in a register barely above a whisper for the next 2 years.
It's not as if I was always a quiet child, my parents will often regale me with the tales of when  I ' the little madam ' would boss my older brother about when we were small. But there was always something about interacting with people who weren't part of my immediate family that terrified me beyond belief .
Various family members who we didn't see that much would often get yes /no answers before I sat in the corner eyeing them suspiciously if they came to visit. To this day I still feel bad that whenever I heard that a certain aunt was coming I would deliberately hide away upstairs from her until she went because her deep voice and loud laugh gave me the heebie jeebies.
And if this was the way I behaved to people I was related to then it doesn't take much to work out that if there was no family connection you'd stand no chance.
One of my favourite trick's on finding that any of my parents friends were coming round to the house was to pretend to be asleep so I wouldn't have to talk to them . In fact I would 'take a nap' so often I'm surprised I was never taken to the doctors to be diagnosed with narcolepsy.
I carried on in this vein for the next 2 years until one kindly old teacher took me aside while reading in a separate room one day and said " let me hear your big voice , no one needs to know about it if you don't want them to ". The " big " voice wasn't much louder than the whisper I had been using for the past couple of years but it was a start and at least now people could ( almost ) hear what I was saying.
Junior school was a bit daunting for someone who was as quiet as me but my advanced reading skills ( well, what do you think I was doing while I was hiding away from people in my bedroom ? ) meant I got on well in lessons . However the downside of this would be in the instance of ' you've read/written that well , why don't you read that out to the rest of the class? Now I don't know about the rest of you but standing in front of 30 expectant faces is daunting enough to someone who is confident in themselves but if you're a shy person you might as well be standing in front of a firing squad for all the sheer panic that's going through your mind at that particular moment . And heaven forbid the suggestion ' Why don't you read it out in assembly? ' should come up...... Someone get the school nurse, I think we might need to call an ambulance !
 I've found over the years that there is a bit of a stigma towards being shy , most confident loud people don't tend to understand that  repeatedly  saying things like" speak up " , " I cant hear you " ," speak louder "  doesn't actually help the timid person very much , in fact it tends to make them want to withdraw from the situation even more. In my case I would get so nervous about saying anything at all that I would rehearse it in my head over and over before even daring to utter it by which time I'd be so wound up with terror that it would stutter out of my mouth like a bad Bruce Forsyth impression. People also tend to think your being a bit rude if your not talking to them but they don't realise that your so terrified of speaking that its all your mind can think about let alone come up with that great conversation opener to break the ice.
 Leaving school at 16 having let my shyness hold me back from exploring any kind of higher education , I was thrust into the world of work where I could make a new start. People didn't know what I'd always been like and lets face it, in the world of retail you can't not talk . I still wasn't a big one for conversation but I did enough to get me through each working day.
A big turning point came in my discovery of a nightclub that played the music I liked to listen to.  At school to try and fit in I'd always gone along with what everyone else would say was cool whilst secretly loving to listen to my mum and dads old records and admiring the 6th formers who dared to dress differently from the pack, listening to the smiths , the cure and other alternative stuff .I'd been experimental on some non uniform days at school and it hadn't always gone down well ( black and red checked woollen trousers when everyone else was wearing stuff like 'I should be so lucky 'era Kylie is a particular one that sticks in the mind )but now those people weren't around to tell me I looked stupid. I started buying old stuff from charity shops and creating a whole new look for myself . With each new look I could become a new character , I was Nina ' the greatest dancer at subsonic' ( ok, I might be exaggerating slightly on that one! ), ' 60s mod girl straight out of Carnarby street or my particular favourite 'the female Jarvis cocker complete with powder blue 70s flared trouser suit and massive blonde afro wig. I might not have been the most talkative person around anyone else but my closest friends but with this new found confidence I did start to bloom a bit more than I had in years .
The biggest breakthrough though was after I had my twins in 2002 whereas before I'd had no-one to protect but myself I now had two little fella's that depended on me even more . After a shaky few years where post natal depression , sleepless nights and the dawning realisation that my life wasn't my own anymore a new person started to emerge . the one who'd let people tell her she wasn't doing things right for her beautiful boys suddenly started answering her critic's back instead of bursting into tears. She didn't take any crap anymore and stood her ground on what she believed was right instead of cowering away from the situation. In fact the change was so noticeable that friends and family started to comment on it . I decided to use it to my advantage . I started going out to the new local indie club on my own and made lots of new friends  through just  talking to people ( previously unheard of in the world of Nina ) and eventually from this gallivanting about D.J DEE VINYL was born. A confident vintage clothing clad whirling dervish of a woman who with her partner in crime the glorious Miss Hayley Rocks decided to take over the world of the solemn male indie D.J and show them a thing or two about looking good on the dance-floor. And the rest so the cliché says is history, Dee Vinyl has a little bit of a confidence crisis around about 2011 that culminates in a major change of course in what she wants to do when she eventually grows up ( which might happen sometime soon but I shouldn't hold your breath ! ) but it sorts itself out towards the end of 2012 when she finds her true talent. (And that's a whole other blog post so I digress.)
So I  finally found my voice with a little help from my two favourite men in the world plus music and clothing .It's not to say I don't have the odd moment when I turn back into shy girl , I still  hate having to use the phone knowing that the minute someone answers it I am likely to start doing that fateful stuttering Brucie impersonation but I learned to turn my fear into something productive and with fellow former shyness sufferers as this

David Bowie.
Bob Dylan.
Joan Rivers.
Cher.
Barbara Streisand.
Lady Gaga.
Elvis Presley.
Abraham Lincoln.
Albert Einstein.
i think the timid and quiet should set their sights "shy " high .

CASINO ROOMS MAKE A BOOB

 

 Sexism - Found alive and well and living in Rochester  Part one .

 

 

 

FORGIVE me for asking , but sometime recently did I fall asleep and wake up in a parallel universe where Women's Lib never happened ?

I enquire because it seems that it was only a couple of weeks ago we were all getting on our high horses about a certain song sung at a high profile Hollywood event that reduced women to what they were hiding under their clothes.

 

That's ok said some its only a bit of fun, its not the sort of thing that men really think of women in this day and age .

Oh really, so in that case this event at Rochester's casino room's is all in my imagination then .

With the tag line " Free entry for exposed cleavage b4 11pm at Kent's Biggest and Breast Venue  ", it does make me wonder if I've suddenly strayed into a politically incorrect sitcom of yesteryear.

I found out about the event through a re-tweet of this article from Medway on line publication The Medwire  http://t.co/eE9AtWJY9n

and I have to agree with everything writer Michelle Gleaves had to say .

 

Don't get me wrong I'm not one to burn my bra , in fact in my case it'd probably be a danger to shipping but this really irks me in the same way Seth Macfarlane and his"we saw your boobs" song did. Have we really gone back to period of time when women were just seen as a pretty piece of meat to be pawed over by the men around them .I'm going out on a limb here but I'm betting not at any point in the Casino's diary is there pencilled in a future date for ' NATIONAL LUNCHBOX / PACKAGE WEEKENDER ' where the lads have to turn up ' tackle out ' in return for free entry . Hundreds of the area's finest ' gentlemen ' showing the ladies just what they could be taking home after a few Sambucca's too many, now that I'd like to see but I'm thinking highly unlikely. And remember guys it's not the size, it's the presentation that counts !

 The claim that its celebrating ' National Cleavage Week ' is all very well but I wonder how the staff would feel if it was their own young daughter being objectified  and leered at by male door staff to determine whether she fits the criteria to enter their establishment .

 How would they feel if that same young girl felt she had to go out in next to nothing to save a bit of money on a night out. From having worked in a nightclub background myself in the past I know first-hand that some youngsters avoid taking winter coats out in freezing temperatures just to cut down on costs whilst risking hypothermia or worse on the way home.

The Casino says that its very mindful of its promotions with a view to not offending anyone but in a world where some of us are trying to teach our children the value of dignity and respect promotions like this really are like a step back in time.

 

 

TO BE CONTINUED............ 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

HOLDING OUT FOR A ZERO

                   Can Bonnie Tyler ‘TURN  AROUND ‘ our U.K  losing streak ?

AS a sometime D.J you would expect my music taste to be fairly cool. However I have a guilty secret, one so bad that it attracts even more condemnation than my choice of daily newspaper.

What is this terrible thing of which you dare not utter, I hear you cry.

Ok, I’ll admit it but please don’t think any worse of me, for it only happens but once a year.

Ok, deep breath, here we go.......I LOVE EUROVISION.
 

There I said it and if the U.K viewing figures for last year’s competition are to be believed I’m not the only one. Along with an approximate 9.5 million other Brits, I tune into that great bastion of cheesy foreign pop ‘THE EUROVISION SONG CONTEST ‘ every year and 2013 won’t be any different. Come Saturday 18^th May, I’ll be in front of my T.V with phone or computer to hand ready to share my views on the proceedings in Malmo, Sweden via social media.

And so it came to pass that it was through this medium on 7^th March that Eurovision fans found out who would be performing our entry this year. BONNIE TYLER TO REPRESENT UK IN EUROVISION squawked thousands of tweets and on-line newspaper headlines.

 It didn’t take long for the jokes to start coming on twitter such as ‘ I got a Bonnie Tyler Sat- Nav. for Xmas , it’s rubbish, it tells you to turn around but every now and then it falls apart ‘ or ‘ I’m livid to find out Bonnie Tyler is not a handsome Scottish decorator’.

Miss Tyler’s name is one that conjures up the epitome of 80s soft rock ballads when the mullet was king and hairspray was the drug of choice. I’m pretty sure the last time she was in the spotlight was back at the start of the new millennium when she was the evening entertainment at Michael Douglas and Catherine Zeta Jones wedding reception. So quite why she’s been chosen to represent the best of what the United Kingdom has to offer I’m not sure.

In general our own little island never seems to get it quite right anymore. If we try to be trendy and with it something more traditional wins and when we go for old and classic something up to date and of the moment is the one that gets its moment of glory. You only have to look at poor old Engelbert Humperdink last year scraping in at second to last while Sweden’s  Lorenna took the top spot with club hit ‘Euphoria ‘.

We didn’t always do so bad, winning twice in the 60s, once in the 70s ,80s and the 90’s, even getting decent chart places with some of the songs regardless of what position they came. Lately though the choice of song or performer doesn’t seem to have the same magic as those from other countries .Maybe the BBC sees it as something as a little bit of a nuisance sibling that it has to keep giving airtime to because they’re related but doesn’t really care too much about . But I think they could be missing a trick.

A lot of the recent year’s winners are songs that have already been at no.1 in their own countries before they come to the competition so why don’t we ever use that mentality. The argument I suppose is that most people who would be a great choice for this plan are the ones who wouldn’t want to touch the opportunity with a bargepole for fear of jeopardising their cool factor. Which then leaves us with those from the x factor /voice style camp but that wouldn’t be so bad either at least some of those are well known all around the globe and much as I despise the man Simon Cowell hasn’t got where he is today without being able to pick a winning formula when he sees  it.

Anyway, let’s get back to Bonnie, I’ve thought long and hard about the theory on the calling up of this lady from the valleys and I’ve come up with this. Our last two winning songs ‘Making your mind up ‘ by Bucks Fizz = 80s school disco classic .‘ Then there was 1997’s Love shine a light ‘by Katrina and the waves who also had the massive 80s hit ‘Walking on Sunshine ‘. And who was the singer of that other rocktastic hit of the 80s ‘ total eclipse of the heart ‘ why none other than miss bonnie herself so I’m thinking the Eurovision boffins finally think they have hit on a formula that might just work , that 80s might just be their lucky number

We will have to wait and see on the conclusion to that particular experiment but until then we’ll have to take bonnie at her word and ‘believe in me ‘.

                     http://youtu.be/cqXk_FRw62Q                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                       

MAMMARY GUY - THE OSCAR'S BIGGEST BOOB?

OSCAR night 2014 - Dame Judi Dench recieves a standing ovation for her rousing rendition of comedy male nudity ditty ” Willies of the silver screen “

OK, maybe that bit isn’t strictly true but if this years ” entertainment ” is anything to go by then who knows .
The entertainment to which I refer of course is the evenings host Seth Macfarlane’s opening song ” We saw your boobs “.
Now, dont get me wrong , I’m not someone who’s had a sense of humour by-pass, on the contrary some of my favourite film moments involve nudity or lavatorial humour but i can see why this has ruffled a few feathers .
The general feeling amongst women tends to fall into the whole double standards category over it . Like i say its highly unlikely we’d see a woman doing a song about male parts on the film worlds biggest night of the year so why is it ok for a male host to do the same. And is the fact he’s got the gay male voice choir singing with him supposed to somehow make up for it cos “hey they are just like us girls” just with slightly less handbags…..
There are those who argue that the song was done tongue in cheek and that looking to macfarlanes creations ’ Family Guy ’ and ’ Ted ‘  it should be obvious thats not how he really feels about women and shouldnt be taken seriously. I get the whole tongue in cheek thing as do pretty much most women but when a host is also cracking jokes about domestic violence and reducing the women who have worked hard to get where they are today to a pair of boobs while doing a coy smile to camera to imply he doesnt mean it he does come across a bit like a nasty school playground bully.
Macfarlane does apparentley have a girlfriend and i do wonder if one day he was to have a daughter if he would appreciate her being reduced to a pair of breasts on a big screen by a smug host .
Its said that he was chosen to shake the oscars up a bit this year maybe they need to shake themselves up a bit next year and realise that women are worth so much more .
Oh and Dame Judi get practising I think i feel a song coming on ……
by Nina Page