Picture the scene, it’s a brisk, chilly spring evening in
the early 90s and I’ve just left my Y.T.S placement at a stationery shop in
Gillingham.
I’m not earning big bucks, but at least that £35 a week
means I have my own income with which to indulge in my two biggest loves,
fashion and music.
Learning to drive is way ahead in the future for me yet so it’s
good old Maidstone and District I’m relying on to get me to and from Wigmore and
Canterbury Street every day and tonight is no exception.
I trudge down to the stop on Skinner Street, sometimes there
are lots of us waiting but tonight I’m on my own so i shove my hands deeper
into my jacket pockets to keep them warm and glance at the road ahead to see if
there’s any sign of the 115 approaching.
Swivelling round to
see if any are coming in the opposite direction it takes me quite by surprise
to find that an unkempt and rather tatty looking fellow in a blue velvet jacket
has sidled up behind me.
He mumbles something incoherent and not wishing to seem rude
i give him a smile before turning my attention back once again to whether the
bus is coming.
It’s as I’m checking my watch to see if when the timetable
says 10 minutes past it actually means this specific ten past or some random
ten minutes of the drivers own choosing that I realise that the person I hadn’t
really paid much attention to behind me is now being very attentive indeed.
The weather is icy cold this evening but his hot breath on
the back of my neck doesn’t warm me as he stands a little too close for comfort.
I shuffle forward slightly thinking maybe he just has a
problem with spatial awareness but with every move i make he’s there close
behind pressing himself right into the small of my back and breathing in my
ear.
Standing frozen to the spot, panicking about what i can do
as by now most of the surrounding businesses have shut up shop for the evening;
you can probably understand the relief i felt as my bus finally appeared round
the corner at that very moment.
I jumped on board and as the doors slammed shut in between
me and him i sat shaking and cursing at myself for not making a fuss and
letting him do that to me.
So that’s why I applaud the New York magazine cover of the
35 Bill Cosby accusers and the empty chair that represents the ones who feel
they can’t or don’t want to make themselves known for making a statement that’s
as powerful as it is simplistic .
My experience wasn’t in any way as harrowing and awful as
what these ladies have been through but i know it’s the reason i have issues
with people standing too close to me or invading my personal space unless I’ve
really got to know them well first.
To me that picture is amazing because it says it’s not ok
for someone to feel they have the right to violate you no matter who they are
or what their opinions of you might be.
And there it is speaking volumes in black and white for the
entire world to see.
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